Thursday, March 28, 2013

DELL COMICS ARE GOOD COMICS, Part 1



I still remember the day I discovered this comic. It was hot outside, but inside the drug store it was cool, and the store had that smell all drug stores had in those days: an intoxicating aroma of soda fountain Cokes and hamburgers, pipe smoke and coffee, and fresh magazines and paperbacks and newsprint.

In the midst of this aroma one day in 1960, I was astonished to discover a Three Stooges COMIC BOOK! I was wild about the Three Stooges, watched them on TV every day, thought about them all the time, even dreamed about them, but it had never occurred to me there might be such a thing as a Three Stooges COMIC BOOK.

I loved comics, was in fact addicted to them, but my primary addiction at this time was the Three Stooges. Thus, discovering the two things together (a Three Stooges COMIC BOOK) was almost more than I could stand.

I should say a few words about my Three Stooges addiction …

For a certain period of time in my childhood, the Three Stooges were my heroes, more so even than Tarzan and Zorro and Superman and Roy Rogers. With all my heart, I wanted to be just like them. They were my role models ... especially Moe.

I would emulate Moe. Yes, it’s true. I would act like Moe, talk like him (“I’ll murder you!”), and of course wear my hair like him ... My father would take such pains to comb my hair (because I wouldn’t). He would pour the hair oil ("greasy kid’s stuff") on my head and slick my hair backwards, digging the comb painfully into my scalp …

And as soon as I was out of his sight, I would push my hair back down over my forehead so I could be like Moe.

My father always wondered why my hair wouldn’t stay in place, but he could never figure it out ... he would just pour more greasy kid’s stuff on my hair, and comb even harder, and harder and harder—but to no avail. Within minutes, as soon as his back was turned, my hair would look like Moe’s again (this, of course, being a prelude to the Hair Wars my father and I fought a few years later starting with Beatlemania).

But, as I say, my emulation of Moe was not just about the hair. I also tried to act like him. Which was not good; it made me an irritating child in the eyes of adults, and among my peers it made me the terror of the playground …

I meant no harm, of course. I was never a bully. To me, it was all in fun, the eye-poking and nose-twisting and head-bopping. It was all comedy, all for laughs. I had no idea I was wreaking havoc. I thought I was spreading good cheer. One day, however, I learned different …

It was 1958. I walked into my kindergarten class one morning and saw two pals of mine standing there, talking. They did not see me walk up behind them, thus were unsuspecting when I grabbed their heads and banged them together—expecting to hear the funny BONK sound it always made when Moe banged Larry and Curly's heads together.

But the BONK sound did not come. Instead, blood came gushing out of one boy’s mouth—it was horrible!—and both boys began crying.

I did the smart thing: I ran away.

An hour later, the teacher found me in a broom closet, crying. I was terrified, sure I was going to get the Electric Paddle for this offense. But I was so contrite, the teacher decided I had learned my lesson—and she was right. I had learned the difference between Movies and Real Life, and never confused the two again.

I remained a Three Stooges addict, however. And two years later, when I found this Dell Comic in the drug store, I was desperate. The color photo cover was frenching my mind! I HAD TO HAVE IT! But my week’s allowance had already been spent. What to do?! I begged my mother for a dime. She was merciful and gave it to me. I bought it, and read it riding home in the car, and read it again when I got home, and read it again and again and again until the comic finally fell apart … then years later found the comic on Ebay, and bought it, so that now, once in a while when I need a Rush, I can take out the comic and look at the cover, and remember … remember how the drug store smelled … remember how it felt to be alive in 1960 … remember the Three Stooges, remember the summer and remember the dream.

Friday, March 22, 2013

Mike Kearby's "Men of Color" Screenplay Honored

I'm happy to announce that my good friend and Texas Tales collaborator Mike Kearby's screenplay "Men of Color" has been announced as an Official Selection of the 2013 Hill Country Film Festival in Fredricksburg, Texas.

Friday, October 26, 2012

Shemp-Satan

Satan came to me in a dream last night. He came in the form of Shemp Howard. He looked like Shemp, acted like Shemp—he was Shemp in every respect … but without the humor …

Shemp-Satan got right in my face going “hee-bee-bee-bee-bee-bee,” but it was annoying and offensive, not funny at all … and menacing ... I pushed him away, tried to walk away, but he started dancing around me, punching me like a prizefighter, going “hee-bee-bee-bee-bee-bee.” And the punches hurt and were full of static electricity that went straight through my spine …

There’s only one thing to do, I realized: Play the God Card …

“O Lord God Almighty,” I prayed out loud, “remove this damnable Stooge of a Devil from my sight etc”—can’t remember the entire prayer, but it worked. Shemp-Satan shriveled away to a tiny disc of purple neon tubing and vanished …

Free at last, I walked down a tree-lined sidewalk into a saloon, loud with music and raucous laughter. A big burly cowboy (just for fun) sprayed a chemical on his head and went up in flames, his laughing maniac face framed by a Stetson Halo of Hell Fire (like Big Tex last week, I realize now in waking life) …

I didn’t like the vibe at all, so left the saloon … and came to a big ramshackle multi-leveled many-roomed barn of a building and fell in love with it right away; the place had a Li’l Rascals Clubhouse quality that felt just right …

So I moved in (squatter’s rights) and set up my studio in a top floor room overlooking a beautiful forest … it was wonderful; the room had a Tarzan’s Tree House feel, and was comfortable and cozy inside, just the perfect place for me … shelves full of books and my vinyl collection and a shortwave stereo booming some kinda’ strange jazz from Nairobi—everything I needed, except Dutch Coffee …

So I went down the street to a Dutch-style coffeehouse and purchased a bag and carried it back to my new abode, but upon returning discovered other people were moving in to the building … an acting company was setting up a theatre space in the big downstairs room … some women were setting up a trendy café in the kitchen … a lot of annoying hustle and bustle, way too many people everywhere …

“It’s Austin all over again,” I thought, not happy with this development, but then I thought: Maybe it’ll be okay, as long as they stay out of my Tarzan Tree House …

So I went upstairs to my room and God, did it ever take a long time to get there … so many more steps than I remembered, up and up, and down and down, and up again, Escher-like architecture twisting in upon itself, going everywhere and nowhere all at once (and all the while I’m trying to hide the bag of Coffee under my coat—flowery buds keep spilling out—incriminating evidence everywhere—I’m constantly bending down to pick up the buds and glancing over my shoulder) …

Finally, I reach my room and encounter three persons on their way out; one carrying something under his arm—it’s one of my record albums!—“Hey, that’s mine!” I scream—he turns (beak-nosed fellow, icy eyes, with an aristocratic attitude) and holds it up—it’s not a record album after all, but a poster I drew—my artwork! …

“Hey buddy,” I say, “if you want it, you PAY for it”—he gives a haughty sniff and says, “You presume to bargain with one who publishes this … sort of thing. I might publish YOUR work some time … if I wish”—and starts to hand me his card … I push it away, saying, “I have no intention of contacting you. It is you who will contact me.”

Wednesday, October 17, 2012

The Fiji Mermaid, the Tamale Lady, and Mr. Barnes


Today there is a long line of fast-food restaurants on that stretch of North Main, but 47 years ago the street was not yet completely commercial; there were still a great many homes—older homes tall and stately, with well-groomed yards, framed by trees, and occupied mostly by older people.
We moved into one of those homes, a two-story brick affair with a large front porch, a screened “sleeping porch” in back, a huge living room, and six bedrooms. We used only four of the bedrooms—one was my parents’, one my sister’s, one mine, with the one in front used as an office—the first office of my father’s weekly newspaper, The Johnson County News. This room did not remain an office for long, however; within a few months, the business moved downtown to West Henderson, just off the courthouse square, leaving three unused bedrooms in that vast old house.
My bedroom was upstairs; it was the largest room in the house, a T-shaped room with pale gray wallpaper and a row of small, roll-up windows high over my bed that caught the North Main streetlights at night. I remember looking up at those windows one night, listening to trucks roar through town, unable to sleep, mourning the friends I’d left behind in Mansfield (I was having trouble making new friends in this larger town of Cleburne), weeping quietly, until the windows began to streak with rain. I took comfort in the rain—I don’t know why exactly …
“Rain good,” I said to myself—in Tonto-speak, because I had lately become fascinated with Indians, thus had taken to speaking as I thought they spoke—yes, I was trying to be an Indian, stoic and brave, able to read omens and signs in nature (“Rain good, rain bring good things”), living free, hunting buffalo, and with no school or homework to worry about. Thumb-tacked to my wall were color-pencil drawings I’d made of Indians, and their tee-pees, tools, weapons, peace pipes, headdresses, and what-not—and piled up on the floor beside my bed were Indian books I’d borrowed from the library downtown.
The Carnegie Library, as it was called, was the best thing I’d discovered in this town. It was bigger than the Mansfield Library, which was just a medium-sized room in the city hall; this library occupied the entire lower floor of a grandly-columned 1904 building, while upstairs was as entire museum—the Layland Museum. I spent many an hour in that museum—always alone, for I never saw another soul enter that silent, musty, tall-windowed room—it was just me, alone and wandering past the glass cases, studying the arrowheads and pottery and fossils and unusual rocks, admiring Buffalo Bill’s and Kit Carson’s saddles, and standing in entranced wonder before the Actual Petrified Remains of a Mermaid.
The Mermaid was small, no more than a foot-and-a-half long from fin to head; its lower body that of a fish and its upper, deeply-ribbed body that of a scrawny monkey, with spindly arms and a shark-toothed grin on its little face, and a scraggly mane of ancient hair still stuck to its head. It amazed me no end.
It was a fraud, of course—no authentic fossil at all, but a relic of bygone carnivals and dime museums, one of many “Fiji Mermaids” (as they were called) created to fool the rubes in the early part of the century—a fraud which apparently fooled Mr. Layland, the wealthy man who bought it and bequeathed it, along with the rest of his collection, to the city for his eponymous museum … and it fooled me, too—a 12-year-old boy in the year 1965, fooled me so thoroughly I returned time and again to gaze upon this marvel, imagining the time, eons ago, when the oceans teemed with these creatures, millions of them riding the waves, baring their teeth and shrieking, long hair flying in the wind …
Though I missed my friends in the old town, I had to admit this new town had its advantages. Mansfield’s population was 1,000; Cleburne’s was 16,000, meaning not only did it have a larger library than Mansfield, it had things Mansfield did not have at all—this museum being just one. Mansfield did not have a City Newsstand, for instance. In Mansfield, I bought my comics, paperbacks, and monster magazines at the drugstore or the two grocery stores that carried them. But here, not only were there several drug and grocery stores that carried these items, the City Newsstand had the largest selection I’d ever seen.
I didn’t like the old gnome who ran the place, though—sitting on his stool, chewing a cigar and watching every move I made, hurrying me up: “Are you gonna’ stand there reading all day, or buy something?” But I was willing to put up with him, because here were things I couldn’t find anywhere else. Also, to his credit, he had no scruples about selling me adult material. He would not let me behind the counter where the hard stuff was kept, but he did not care in the least if I perused the soft-core section—Humorama digests, Playboy, Bachelor, Gent, and other men’s magazines, which I would buy and study avidly for hours on end.
Yes, there was more of everything in Cleburne—not only books and magazines, but interesting people as well—“town characters,” as they were called—oddballs, eccentrics, people with back stories that could be funny, fascinating, grotesque, sad, or all of the above. The strangest of these, I think—and the saddest of all—was the Tamale Lady …
She lived down the street from us in a one-story white house surrounded by a yard barren of all vegetation save grass—there were no shrubs or flowers, not even a tree, just a few scattered tree stumps—nothing in that sad little yard but a small metal sign that read, "Hot Tamales 12 for $1."

I would ask my mother if we could buy some tamales. The answer was always no, until one day, too tired to cook after working at the newspaper office all day, she sent me and my six-year-old sister down the street to buy some tamales.

I knocked, and waited, then knocked again. No answer. We were about to leave when the door slowly opened, and peering out of the dark interior was a thin, white wraith of a woman dressed all in black.
“We’re here to buy some tamales,” I said.
She smiled and said in a whispery voice, "Come in, children ..." 
We entered. I gave her the dollar and she disappeared into the kitchen, leaving us alone in a large living room, heavily curtained to keep out the sunlight and devoid of any furniture—but not empty, oh no ...
Instead of furniture, the room was filled with artwork—dioramas created by the woman herself. The centerpiece of each diorama was a small, wooden coffin, decorated with buttons and beads, with a plastic baby doll lying inside, eyes closed, dressed in handmade burial clothes, and behind each coffin was a large painted square of ply board with Bible verses lettered on it and lined with blinking Christmas lights, the only source of light in the room.
My sister and I looked at each display, and soon discovered there were even more in an adjoining room (what should have been the dining room), and still more in another room, and all the same: dolls in coffins, Bible verses, and blinking Christmas lights.
We said nothing. We didn’t know what to say, or think. The cheery Christmas lights evoked one mood, the little death scenes quite another. I felt I had to say something, and felt it should be something nice, so I said to my sister, "These are pretty, aren’t they?"—but not with a lot of conviction. My sister, staring at everything with wide eyes, only nodded.
The woman returned and handed me the newspaper-wrapped tamales. She whispered sweetly to us to come again. But we never went back.

Later, I learned she was known as the Tamale Lady. Her story was this: years ago, she had a baby, but it died—and from that day forward she made these dioramas, and with each one relived the day she dressed her little baby for burial …
Winter passed, and spring came. School let out—and, though I had made some friends, none were close. I had no one to hang out with that summer, no social life of any kind.
Some of the time I spent working in my father’s office—odd jobs, sweeping, emptying the trash, running errands, basic office work, and on Wednesdays when the paper came out, rolling papers and helping my father deliver them. But the rest of the time I was on my own. I visited my favorite haunts: the library, newsstand, record shop, variety store, or went to a movie—but mostly I just wandered the town.
I would wander to the city park, buy a snow cone, look through the fence at the kids swimming in the city pool—but not seeing any friends there, didn’t take part.
Or, I would wander up Boone Street and stand on the viaduct overlooking the Santa Fe Railroad Shops and watch the trains below, moving back and forth on multiple tracks, northbound, southbound … and wishing that, wherever they were going, I could hitch a ride and escape this town.
There was only so much wandering I could do—only so much to see—so as the summer wore on, I spent more time at home, reading or drawing, or writing—filling up a spiral notebook with stories about two buddies, Sam and Zeke, and their adventures around the world—or watching “Where the Action Is” on TV, or listening to my transistor radio (“I Can’t Get No Satisfaction” felt like the story of my life), or target-practicing with my B-B gun in the back yard.
It was while engaged in this activity that I met Mr. Barnes. I’d seen him before working in his back yard, and seen him a few times talking to my father. But I had never exchanged a word with him myself, nor would it have occurred to me to strike up a conversation with an old man working in his yard, or that he would be interested in talking to me. Therefore, it was a surprise when he stepped into the yard one day and introduced himself.
He asked how old I was. “Twelve,” I said.
“That’s a good age to be,” he said. “You know how old I am? I’m 85 years old. I was born in 1880 … in a log cabin in Kentucky.”
I was impressed. “1880? You were born before Billy the Kid was killed.”
“You know your history, don’t you?” he laughed. “How do you like Cleburne?”
“It’s okay.”
“Well, I came here when I was five years old, and I’ve been here ever since. I was an engineer on the Santa Fe railroad for a long time. But now I’m retired.”
He sat down in one of the lawn chairs. “I’ve seen a lot of change in my time,” he said. “We didn’t have cars when I was a boy. Those were the horse-and-buggy days. Didn’t even have radios yet, or movies. And this was a real Wild West town. You’re interested in the Wild West, aren’t you?”
I said I was, and told him I’d seen Buffalo Bill and Kit Carson’s saddles at the museum.
“Oh, that’s nothing!” he said. “I saw Buffalo Bill himself. I was about your age. He brought his circus here to Cleburne. I remember there was a big parade downtown around the square, and there he was big as life, Buffalo Bill. Oh, he was a handsome devil with that long silver hair of his. People say the Beatles have long hair, but their hair isn’t half as long as Buffalo Bill Cody’s.”
We talked a while longer, then Mr. Barnes said, “I could show you some interesting things if you’d like to see them. I could show you the Santa Fe Shops. They don’t let just anybody in, but I can get in. I’ll talk to your dad about it.”
He made good on his promise, and on a Sunday (when the Shops were closed), he took me on a guided tour. It was interesting, I recall, but the details have mostly faded from my memory. What is more memorable, however, was the time he took me and my sister on a drive into the country south of Cleburne.
We drove to the top of Bee Mountain in Bosque County (just south of Johnson County), then down to Kimball Bend on the Brazos River. “Right here,” he said, “is where the great Chisholm Trail crossed.”
“Did you know any cowboys?” I asked.
“Oh yes, I knew many a cowboy, and not the drugstore kind either. I knew real cowboys who really went up the trail. But, you know, the heyday of the big trail drives was pretty much over by the time I was a boy. There wasn’t any need to drive cattle all the way to Kansas after the railroads reached here.”
Before going on this drive, my father had told me to ask Mr. Barnes about some Indian fighters he had known. So I asked him.
Mr. Barnes frowned, thought a moment, then said, “You know, I always thought the Indians got a bad deal. And those two fellows you’re talking about—they weren’t heroes, not to me. Yes, I remember them. I was about your age, but I remember them all right—a couple of loud-mouthed old drunks is what they were, sitting in front of the saloon all day. Everybody thought they were such heroes, but not me, no sir. All they did was go in and kill a peaceful village of Kickapoo up where Arlington is now. It wasn’t any kind of a fair fight. No, the Indians got a bad deal all the way around.”
Several months after this ride with Mr. Barnes, we moved away from North Main to another part of town. Before we left, Mr. Barnes gave me a piece of furniture he had made in his workshop. I’m not sure what to call it, or if it even has a name. It was an invention of his own: a sort of cushioned bench, with train car springs inside. All these years later, I still have it.
I last saw Mr. Barnes when I was a teenager. We met in the post office. He must have been 90 by this time, but he was still getting around by himself, still driving, still mentally sharp, but there was a tremor now in his voice, and his face was gaunt—his ears, I remember, were now long and stuck out from his head—but he was still sharp, as I say, and he recognized me right away, and was happy to see me. We talked for a few minutes—I don’t remember what we talked about—then we shook hands and parted.
In later years, I read about the Indian fight he described. It is known as the Battle of Village Creek--the creek so named because a village of Indians was located on its banks. In 1841, these Indians were blamed for a series of depredations against the white settlers who were just moving in to the area. As a result, they were attacked and suffered heavy losses. Most historians today doubt this tribe was responsible for the depredations. So it seems Mr. Barnes was right: the Indians got a bad deal all the way around ...

Friday, October 12, 2012

Nuevo Laredo Film Shoot

Nuevo Laredo, shooting on location. The film is about the drug cartel wars. Couldn’t be a more dangerous film to make under more dangerous conditions. The camera is hidden in the director’s lapel to disguise what we’re doing. I’m acting in a scene with Ed Asner in a crowded plaza. It’s intimidating to work with such a notable actor, but I do my best.  Asner is right in my face, shouting about a terrible shooting he just witnessed. “Wow, this is an intense scene,” I think, then realize he’s not acting. Gunmen are roaming through the plaza, randomly killing people. The director doesn’t even say “Cut.” He just starts running. We all run … blood and mayhem everywhere … I run for a parking garage, the gunmen right behind me … can’t find my car … a car speeds out of control down the ramp—the driver has been shot through the head … bullets still flying … only one thing to do: as the car passes, I grab the door handle and hold on for dear life flying towards the exit, gunfire all around … “I’m going to die!” … the car careens out of the garage onto a street of restaurants and clubs. On a balcony, tourists sit calmly sipping margaritas … the car hits the building, the balcony collapses … I pull myself out of the wreckage and see lying next to me two debris-and-blood-covered American women still drinking their margaritas, continuing their conversation as if nothing has happened …

 

Monday, October 08, 2012

The Things You See

Today, I remembered something I hadn’t thought of in a long time. It was something I saw when I was four years old.

I was standing in the Sears store in Arlington, Texas, when I heard a loud clip-clopping noise. Turning, I saw coming towards me a legless woman walking on her hands. On her hands she wore a pair of shiny red shoes, and as she moved, the shoes smacked the floor with a clip-clop clip-clop.

I was astonished. Being a young child, I had not yet learned it was impolite to stare at a disabled person. Nor did I understand the concept of disability, or realize there was anything wrong with the woman. I thought she was supposed to be that way. To me, it was simply wondrous that she walked on her hands. So I stared at her, smiling in delight.

As she passed, she flashed me an equally delighted smile, then disappeared down an aisle, clip-clopping away.

Oh, the things you see as a child, and because you see them with fresh eyes, they have such a magical quality and your reactions to these things are completely authentic and without the least inhibition.

I remember another incident. This one too involved a store, and I was about the same age. My mother and I were walking in downtown Fort Worth. We passed a department store window full of mannequins, all of them posed in their usual positions, everything normal except for one thing: they were all completely naked.

I burst out laughing at the sight, and laughed wildly, uncontrollably. My laughter caught the eye of the woman in the window who was preparing to dress the mannequins, causing her to laugh as well.

I do not remember if my mother laughed, but I do remember her pulling me away from the window and telling me to tone it down.

Oh, the things you see, the things you see … and, of course, not all of them are funny.

I was a little older. We were coming back from a family vacation on the coast, traveling down a two-lane highway somewhere in Central Texas. The traffic slowed to a crawl. There was an accident up ahead.
As we drew nearer, we saw what had happened. A car had hit a horse-drawn wagon. You still saw the occasional wagon on rural roads in those days, as there were still a few die-hard old farmers who either could not, or would not, buy a truck. It was, of course, dangerous for wagons to share the road with cars, as this accident demonstrated all too well.
The wagon was smashed and lying on its side, and lying nearby were two dead horses.
The owner of the wagon and horses—an old man in overalls—was not hurt, but he appeared to be in shock. He stood there looking at his horses with a blank, hopeless expression.
My eyes began to water, then the tears poured. Nothing upset me so much in those days as the death of an animal, and here were two dead animals …
A couple of years later, I saw another tragic highway scene. I was riding with my father when we came on the scene of an accident. An ambulance, a cop car, and several other cars were pulled over to the side of the road.
My father pulled over and went to see what had happened, while I waited in the car. After a few minutes, he came back and said a boy had been killed trying to cross the road to the farmhouse where he lived. He had gotten off the school bus, excited to see the family’s new TV set (their first, I imagine) and had run straight into the path of a car.
As we drove past the accident scene, I saw the car that hit the boy. Inside sat a woman behind the steering wheel, crying.
That image still comes back to me from time to time, whenever I think of the sad burdens people carry in this life …
When I was eleven, I became old enough to explore the Midway at the State Fair by myself—as long as I kept my eye on my watch and met my parents on time in front of Big Tex.
After riding a number of rides, and losing money at the coin toss, I came upon the freak show. I’d always wanted to see the freak show, but my parents had always said no. But now, there was nothing to stop me. Now, finally, I could see with my own eyes the Octopus Boy, the 1,000-Pound Woman, the World’s Tallest Man, and all the others. Their painted images on the banners seemed so fantastic I could hardly believe they were real, but the barker gave his personal guarantee that they were indeed real, and anyone who doubted need only pay one dollar to see for themselves.
I paid my dollar and went into the tent, where a large group of people were listening to a man on a platform talk. And boy, could he talk. He talked and talked, and talked, promising any moment to show us the most amazing things we’d ever seen, or ever would see, in our lives. I was excited, but also getting impatient.
Finally, he announced that he would now show us a Medical Marvel, the likes of which had never been seen anywhere before, until now—a Freak of Nature so stupendous, so shocking, so awe-inspiring, that we would regret it for the rest of our lives if we did not see it. And it only cost a quarter.
I had exactly a quarter left, and felt a little cheated, having already spent a dollar just to listen to this man talk. But I realized, looking at my watch, that time was running out and if I did not spend my quarter, I would never see any freaks.
So I paid my quarter and followed a crowd of people into another partitioned area of the tent. There, on a small wooden platform, sat a man on a folding chair next to something covered up with a sheet. The man smoked a cigar and was cross-eyed. I hoped he wasn’t the promised Freak of Nature.
When the room was entirely full, the other man—the talking man—came into the room and told us that what we were about to see was One-Hundred-Percent Genuine and One-of-a-Kind: it was a two-headed baby.

He gave a signal to the cigar-smoking man, who pulled away the sheet, revealing a giant jar of formaldehyde with two dead babies floating inside.
“Siamese twins,” the man said. “As you can see, they are no longer attached. This was due to an attempt to surgically separate them—an attempt which they did not survive.”
The babies were white and withered, their eyes tight shut, their bony little arms drawn up to their chins. I stared at them in horror for a few minutes, getting my money’s worth, then left.
I was depressed the rest of the day, and though I returned to the State Fair many times after that, never went back to the freak show.
The things you see, the things you see …
But I should not end on such a gruesome note, but rather, tell of something else I saw as a boy. It, too, was in a tent, but had an altogether different effect on me.
A tent revival came to town one summer day. My friend Joe and I watched them set up the tent, thinking it might be a circus of some kind, and were disappointed when a man told us what it was and urged us to attend—and bring our parents. We left on our bicycles, with no intention of doing either.
But later that night, bored and with nothing else to do—and hearing the music and shouting far off down the road—we grew curious. We remembered the man had told us there would be faith healings—the lame would walk, the blind would see, and so forth—a spectacle we realized we could not miss. So, we hopped on our bikes and rode off down the road.
We were a little afraid to go inside, but it was an adventure, and adventures are few and far between in a sleepy little town. So not only did we enter the noisy tent, we even sat near the front to get a good view when the healings started.
The preacher was stomping back and forth on the podium, face red as a beet and screaming at the top of his lungs as he described the torments of Hell: oceans of boiling water, agony beyond description, and all of it lasting into Eternity. It was terrifying, which of course was his intent.
Above the podium was a bright light, around which a number of moths were swirling. They also from time to time swirled near the preacher who kept opening his mouth wide to holler, till finally—it was just a matter of time—one of the moths flew straight into his mouth.
The sermon ground to a halt as he began coughing and sputtering. Someone jumped onto the podium to slap him on the back. His eyes bulged as he coughed and gagged, trying to bring up the moth, which no doubt was fluttering around in his gullet, causing him considerable distress. A murmur of concern went through the congregation, as not everyone knew what had happened. He might be dying for all they knew. More concerned people poured onto the podium trying to help.
It was the most ridiculous thing I’d ever seen. I knew I shouldn’t laugh, and tried not to—but when I glanced at Joe and saw him struggling not to laugh, it was all over. We both burst out laughing, and ran out of the tent into the darkness and fell on our knees in the grass, laughing till we hurt. And later, when we got back on our bikes and started home, we had to stop a few times to laugh some more.
Oh, the things you see …

Sunday, October 07, 2012

The Dead

To date, the death toll in Afghanistan stands at 2,000 US troops and 13,009 civilians. In Iraq: 3,332 US troops and an estimated 119,000 civilians. Pakistani deaths due to ongoing drone strikes so far number 3,325 (some 474 to 881 of those were civilians, including 176 children).

If we add the body counts above—American, Iraqi, Afghan, and Pakistani—the total number of deaths so far from the “War on Terror” stands at 140,666 human beings.

I should add that the US death toll does not include war veterans who later died of their wounds, or those who commit suicide (estimated at 18 veterans per day). I should add, too, that the civilian death tolls above are conservative figures; the actual number could be much higher.

At any rate, this conservative figure of 140,666 is many times more than the 3,000 or so who died in the September 11 terror attacks—the provocative act that was used as the excuse to start this war.

It would be nice if this ongoing holocaust were an issue in the current presidential campaign, but both the Republican and Democratic candidates spoke only of a “strong national defense,” while the three third-party candidates who would have made it an issue were excluded from the debates.

Americans could demand something better of their political system. But will they?

The numbers above were collected from the following sources:
http://www.iraqbodycount.org/
http://antiwar.com/casualties/
http://abcnews.go.com/Politics/OTUS/2000-dead-cost-war-afghanistan/story?id=17367728
http://rt.com/news/pakistan-march-us-drones-792/